There was a man who said, "I never knew what happiness was until I got married...and then it was too late!"
Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters.
It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.
Getting married is very much like going to the restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
Losing a wife can be hard. In some cases, it's almost impossible.
He who knows nothing, knows nothing. But he who knows he knows nothing knows something. And he who knows someone whose friend's wife's brother knows nothing, he knows something. Or something like that.
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None.
It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.
Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad?
Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it.
Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Hubby: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problems disappear.
Wife: You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you??
Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one?"
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