Tuesday, May 30, 2006

of dollars and frog


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Pinoy chicks in U.S.
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The other day, my american friends and I went to a Ladies Night Club. One of the girls wanted to impress the rest of us, so she pulled out a 10 dollar bill. When the male dancer came over to us, my friend licked the 10 dollar bill and stuck it to his butt cheek!

Not to be outdone, another friend pulls out a 50 dollar bill. She calls the guy back over, licks the 50 dollar bill, and sticks it to his other butt cheek. In another attempt to impress the rest of us, my third friend pulls out a 100 dollar bill and calls the guy over, and licks the bill. I'm worried about the way things are going, but fortunately she just stuck it to one of his butt cheeks, again.

My relief was short lived. Seeing the way things are going, the guy gyrates over to me! Now everyone's attention is focused on me, and the guy's egging me on to try to top the 100 dollar. My brain was churning as I reached for my wallet. What could I do? Then the pinoy ingenuity in me took over! I got out my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his ass, grabbed the 160 bucks, and went home. . .


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Dead Frog
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One day a twelve-year-old walks into a whorehouse dragging a dead frog on a string behind him. He slaps a hundred-dollar bill on the counter and says, "I want one of your women."

The madam looks at him and says, "Don't you think you're a bit young for that?"

He slaps another hundred on the counter and says, "I want one of your women."

The madam says, "Okay have a seat, she'll be down in about twenty minutes."

He slaps another hundred on the counter and says, "She has to have active herpes."

The madam starts to sputter and asks why, but he slaps another hundred on the counter and says, "Active herpes."

She responds, "Okay have a seat - it'll be about ten minutes."

Ten minutes later, a woman comes out, they go upstairs (dragging this dead frog) and do their deal.

As he's leaving, the madam asks him, "Okay why did you want someone with active herpes?"

The kid replies, "When I get home, I'm going to screw the baby sitter. And when mom and dad get home, dad will take the baby sitter home and screw her on the way. And when he gets back, he and mom are going to go upstairs and screw. And tomorrow morning after dad goes to work, the milkman will come in and mom will screw him.

And he's the bastard that ran over my frog.

1 comment:

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