Friday, March 31, 2006
Neil's Drawing
he's gonna draw a simple car, show it to me and then he'll "pimp" his drawing... we've been watching too much Pimp my Ride lately....
Thursday, March 30, 2006
Little Johnny: Lovely story
(don't have time for yakking today... so, let's have another joke...)
Little Johnny was at school when the teacher asked the class to come up with a sentence or a story containing the word "Lovely".
Well, Little Johnny was waving his hand in the air frantically. The teacher decided not to ask Little Johnny and picked Alice. Alice got up and said, "Today, it is sunny outside and the children are playing outside. What a lovely day!"
The teacher again did not want to ask Little Johnny who was still waving his hand in the air frantically. The teacher picked Billy to tell his story. Billy got up and said, "I went to my sisters wedding last week. The church was decorated with flowers and ribbons. Everyone remarked that the bride and groom made a lovely couple."
By this time the teacher decided to ask Little Johnny since she could not think of anything he could say wrong with the word "lovely" in the story. Little Johnny stood up and told his story. "The other day I was sitting at the dining room table with my family. My sister spoke up and told my dad that she had a new boyfriend." The teacher thought this was great, Little Johnny had not said anything offensive so she made him continue.
Little Johnny continued, "She then told my dad that she was pregnant. My dad replied, 'Lovely, just F***en Lovely'."
__________________
Little Johnny was at school when the teacher asked the class to come up with a sentence or a story containing the word "Lovely".
Well, Little Johnny was waving his hand in the air frantically. The teacher decided not to ask Little Johnny and picked Alice. Alice got up and said, "Today, it is sunny outside and the children are playing outside. What a lovely day!"
The teacher again did not want to ask Little Johnny who was still waving his hand in the air frantically. The teacher picked Billy to tell his story. Billy got up and said, "I went to my sisters wedding last week. The church was decorated with flowers and ribbons. Everyone remarked that the bride and groom made a lovely couple."
By this time the teacher decided to ask Little Johnny since she could not think of anything he could say wrong with the word "lovely" in the story. Little Johnny stood up and told his story. "The other day I was sitting at the dining room table with my family. My sister spoke up and told my dad that she had a new boyfriend." The teacher thought this was great, Little Johnny had not said anything offensive so she made him continue.
Little Johnny continued, "She then told my dad that she was pregnant. My dad replied, 'Lovely, just F***en Lovely'."
__________________
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Thirty ways to be offensive at a funeral...
(after my recent experience at a funeral, the ceremonies, rituals, bloopers, etc. finally found a joke about it... had a good laugh with this one...)
_____________________________________________________
Tell the widow that the deceased's last wish was that she make love with you.
Tell the undertaker that he can't close the coffin until you find your contact lens.
Punch the body and tell people that he hit you first.
Tell the widow that you're the deceased's gay lover.
Ask someone to take a snapshot of you shaking hands with the deceased.
At the cemetery, play taps on a kazoo.
Walk around telling people that you've seen the will and they're not in it.
Ask the widow to give you a kiss.
Drive behind the widow's limo and keep honking your horn.
Tell the undertaker that your dog just died and ask if he can sneak him into the coffin.
Put a hard-boiled egg in the mouth of the deceased.
Slip a whoopee cushion under the widow.
Leave some phony dog poop on top of the deceased.
Tell the widow that you have to leave early and ask if the will can be read before the funeral is over.
Urge the widow to give the deceased's wooden leg to someone poor who can't afford firewood.
Walk around telling people that the deceased didn't like them.
Use the deceased's tongue to lick a stamp.
Ask the widow for money which the deceased owes you.
Take up a collection to pay off the deceased' gambling debts.
Ask the widow if you can have the body to practice tattooing on.
Put crazy Glue on the deceased's lips just before the widow's last kiss.
Show up at the funeral services in a clown suit.
If the widow cries, blow a trumpet every time she wipes her nose.
When no-one's looking, slip plastic vampire-teeth into the deceased's mouth.
Toss a handful of cooked rice on the deceased and scream "MAGGOTS! MAGGOTS!" and pretend to faint.
At the cemetery take bets on how long it takes a body to decompose.
Goose the widow as she bends over to throw dirt on the coffin.
Circulate a petition to have the body stuffed instead of buried.
Tell everyone you're from the IRS and you're confiscating the coffin for back-taxes.
Promise the minister a hundred dollars if he doesn't keep a straight face while praising the deceased.
_____________________________________________________
Tell the widow that the deceased's last wish was that she make love with you.
Tell the undertaker that he can't close the coffin until you find your contact lens.
Punch the body and tell people that he hit you first.
Tell the widow that you're the deceased's gay lover.
Ask someone to take a snapshot of you shaking hands with the deceased.
At the cemetery, play taps on a kazoo.
Walk around telling people that you've seen the will and they're not in it.
Ask the widow to give you a kiss.
Drive behind the widow's limo and keep honking your horn.
Tell the undertaker that your dog just died and ask if he can sneak him into the coffin.
Put a hard-boiled egg in the mouth of the deceased.
Slip a whoopee cushion under the widow.
Leave some phony dog poop on top of the deceased.
Tell the widow that you have to leave early and ask if the will can be read before the funeral is over.
Urge the widow to give the deceased's wooden leg to someone poor who can't afford firewood.
Walk around telling people that the deceased didn't like them.
Use the deceased's tongue to lick a stamp.
Ask the widow for money which the deceased owes you.
Take up a collection to pay off the deceased' gambling debts.
Ask the widow if you can have the body to practice tattooing on.
Put crazy Glue on the deceased's lips just before the widow's last kiss.
Show up at the funeral services in a clown suit.
If the widow cries, blow a trumpet every time she wipes her nose.
When no-one's looking, slip plastic vampire-teeth into the deceased's mouth.
Toss a handful of cooked rice on the deceased and scream "MAGGOTS! MAGGOTS!" and pretend to faint.
At the cemetery take bets on how long it takes a body to decompose.
Goose the widow as she bends over to throw dirt on the coffin.
Circulate a petition to have the body stuffed instead of buried.
Tell everyone you're from the IRS and you're confiscating the coffin for back-taxes.
Promise the minister a hundred dollars if he doesn't keep a straight face while praising the deceased.
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
PaniC AttacK
i haven't been going out lately... it's been home - work and vice versa. so, i'm running out of stories to tell. it was actually after our beach escapade last sunday, when i had trouble sleeping at night. i decided to stay away from my edgy night time entertainment journey... t'was like, i was on the verge of dozing-off when weird picture flashes thru my brain... i get-up and try to sleep again... and it happens again! two nights in a row was like hell...
everything has been edgy with my life right now... the detail's such a turn-off... i try not to think about it. block, delete, erased, zip....
... but i got to face the music or it'll be like vicious cycle... messy.
me.
everything has been edgy with my life right now... the detail's such a turn-off... i try not to think about it. block, delete, erased, zip....
... but i got to face the music or it'll be like vicious cycle... messy.
me.
Sunday, March 26, 2006
BeacH
no, i didn't go to beach roots bar. for a change, we went to the beach, instead. "it's payback time for the family cio, let's hit the beach!" sarsy told me two weeks ago. an invitation i could not have refused had it been made earlier, but we were on our way to the mall with our "church vesture." (just got that word right now - in this very moment). so yesterday, we finally had a go.
it's been a while now that i have been pre-occupied with work and beach roots... hardly have time for family. not to mention, just recently, my work's got "promoted." meaning more work, same pay (or should i say, less). i'm supposed to be handling work with only one dealership but thanks to my excellent and good "kiss-ass" rapport with the people of the agencies i deal, i took over the job of one fatso liaison from one of our sister company (whom i'd love to kick his a$$ for; leaving me more problems than i already have) and more work for our two branches elsewhere. been crazy lately.
finally, after five months of beach deprived existence, i'm back to the place i love. nothing fancy. no island hopping, jet skiing, scuba diving or parasailing. not even snorkeling. beach, plain as day... i'm glad to know, after months off the beach, i still have that swimming skills i learn in college. i was short of breath though... haven't been to ccsc for eons.
cool..... but videoke-laden beach! i bet the owner earns more from videokes than the rentals. the booze me and sarsy brought along made up for the "not so great" resort.
can't wait for the lent holidays.... just don't know where to go yet.
it's been a while now that i have been pre-occupied with work and beach roots... hardly have time for family. not to mention, just recently, my work's got "promoted." meaning more work, same pay (or should i say, less). i'm supposed to be handling work with only one dealership but thanks to my excellent and good "kiss-ass" rapport with the people of the agencies i deal, i took over the job of one fatso liaison from one of our sister company (whom i'd love to kick his a$$ for; leaving me more problems than i already have) and more work for our two branches elsewhere. been crazy lately.
finally, after five months of beach deprived existence, i'm back to the place i love. nothing fancy. no island hopping, jet skiing, scuba diving or parasailing. not even snorkeling. beach, plain as day... i'm glad to know, after months off the beach, i still have that swimming skills i learn in college. i was short of breath though... haven't been to ccsc for eons.
cool..... but videoke-laden beach! i bet the owner earns more from videokes than the rentals. the booze me and sarsy brought along made up for the "not so great" resort.
can't wait for the lent holidays.... just don't know where to go yet.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
preoccupation
it would have been a continuation
of my "ordeal" story
but today
i'm soooo tired
i had a lot of things done
that's the good part
but -- i'm beat!
yet, there's still plenty
of things to do
work sucks!
i could use
a really nice massage
but i just wanna go home
put my feet up
chill and maybe detox
i just wanted
to open my mouth
and breathe
taking it all in
then letting it out
need to feel better soon
coz there's a lot
of work waiting
this is pointless.
of my "ordeal" story
but today
i'm soooo tired
i had a lot of things done
that's the good part
but -- i'm beat!
yet, there's still plenty
of things to do
work sucks!
i could use
a really nice massage
but i just wanna go home
put my feet up
chill and maybe detox
i just wanted
to open my mouth
and breathe
taking it all in
then letting it out
need to feel better soon
coz there's a lot
of work waiting
this is pointless.
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
TOAD THE WET SPROCKET - "Listen"
Well I wonder do we learn
Seems we're making the same wrong turn
Call you sacred call you obscene
Call you faithless call you anything
Call and you listen
Listen
Listen
Listen
So I'm a liar so it seems
My desire could justify anything
So is there nothing that lies in between
This cold silence and a scream
Scream listen
Listen
Listen
Listen
Caught in headlines
We are frozen
Cannot hide
There's no break
No time
If you can
I might
Listen
Call and you listen
Listen
Listen
Listen
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
the ordeal 01
my apologies to some people who may have felt slighted by my insensitive comments yesterday... duh!
so, finally, it's over. the excruciating ordeal was done. my lenten sacrifice - check. i finally know how it feels to be driving behind the funeral car... how to run the vehicle in super-slow-motion. it's like this: put it on first gear, don't step on the gas just release the clutch every now and then, break just a little bit (you don't wanna crash into another car), don't stop even if it's a red light, stay on the line even if PUJ's and other vehicles are losing patience with the crawling funeral procession and are itching to overtake on the left side only to find out that there's a lot of approaching vehicle just the same... at least, i managed to put a smile on, thinking how stupid they are driving themselves into a trap.
the heat was just as intense. i mean, almost everyday for the last few months, it was raining or something but yesterday was torture. the aircon, incapable of functioning to the fullest made my sacrifice more meaningful.... now, my conscience would feel better come lent... holding that freakin' cold beer.
i thought after arriving the cemetery(duh!!), the ordeal will be over. but they still have few tricks up their sleeve!
to be continued....
so, finally, it's over. the excruciating ordeal was done. my lenten sacrifice - check. i finally know how it feels to be driving behind the funeral car... how to run the vehicle in super-slow-motion. it's like this: put it on first gear, don't step on the gas just release the clutch every now and then, break just a little bit (you don't wanna crash into another car), don't stop even if it's a red light, stay on the line even if PUJ's and other vehicles are losing patience with the crawling funeral procession and are itching to overtake on the left side only to find out that there's a lot of approaching vehicle just the same... at least, i managed to put a smile on, thinking how stupid they are driving themselves into a trap.
the heat was just as intense. i mean, almost everyday for the last few months, it was raining or something but yesterday was torture. the aircon, incapable of functioning to the fullest made my sacrifice more meaningful.... now, my conscience would feel better come lent... holding that freakin' cold beer.
i thought after arriving the cemetery(duh!!), the ordeal will be over. but they still have few tricks up their sleeve!
to be continued....
Some driving humor
The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's driving school
Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can't see my license plate.
Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?
A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying "Guns don't kill people. I do."
Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car?
A: Always wear a condom.
Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.
Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too s--t faced to find your keys.
Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.
Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?
A: The color.
Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A: Heavy psychedelics.
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A: Carry loaded weapons.
Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer?
A: It would be tough to be a d--khead all day long.
Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can't see my license plate.
Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?
A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying "Guns don't kill people. I do."
Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car?
A: Always wear a condom.
Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.
Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too s--t faced to find your keys.
Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.
Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?
A: The color.
Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A: Heavy psychedelics.
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A: Carry loaded weapons.
Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer?
A: It would be tough to be a d--khead all day long.
Letter of Recommendation
While working with Mr. Santos, I have always found him
working studiously and sincerely at his table without idling or
gossiping with colleagues in the office. He seldom
wastes his time on useless things. Given a job, he always
finishes the given assignment in time. He is always deeply
engrossed in his official work, and can never be
found chitchatting in the canteen. He has absolutely no
vanity in spite of his high accomplishment and profound
knowledge of his field. I think he can easily be
classed as outstanding, and should on no account be
dispensed with. I strongly feel that Mr. Santos should be
pushed to accept promotion, and a proposal to administration be
sent away as soon as possible.
Sd/- Branch Manager
-----------------------------------------------------------------
A second note following the report:
MR. SANTOS WAS PRESENT WHEN I WAS WRITING THE REPORT MAILED TO YOU TODAY. KINDLY READ ONLY THE ALTERNATIVE LINES 1,3,5,7,9,11,13 FOR MY TRUE ASSESSMENT OF HIM.
REGARDS,
Sd/- Branch Manager
working studiously and sincerely at his table without idling or
gossiping with colleagues in the office. He seldom
wastes his time on useless things. Given a job, he always
finishes the given assignment in time. He is always deeply
engrossed in his official work, and can never be
found chitchatting in the canteen. He has absolutely no
vanity in spite of his high accomplishment and profound
knowledge of his field. I think he can easily be
classed as outstanding, and should on no account be
dispensed with. I strongly feel that Mr. Santos should be
pushed to accept promotion, and a proposal to administration be
sent away as soon as possible.
Sd/- Branch Manager
-----------------------------------------------------------------
A second note following the report:
MR. SANTOS WAS PRESENT WHEN I WAS WRITING THE REPORT MAILED TO YOU TODAY. KINDLY READ ONLY THE ALTERNATIVE LINES 1,3,5,7,9,11,13 FOR MY TRUE ASSESSMENT OF HIM.
REGARDS,
Sd/- Branch Manager
Monday, March 20, 2006
bury a bone
while driving home last night, i thought about the things that are gonna happen today. well, my wife "imposed" on me to do the driving on our way to the cemetery... damn, i hate typing that word... my wife's such an old school!! three places i hate: hospital, funeral parlor and of course, you've read it...
is it really necessary to do all these ceremonies i'm about to immerse myself into? go to the mass (i'm not catholic), walk from the church all the way to the... ah! cemetery???! said it again! were young, the generation x people... open/broad-minded, liberated kind. why all the trouble? our modern world calls for practicality. and oh, can't we have a little consideration with others? you know, the traffic. i don't know about people of my age but when it comes to these places (the three mentioned), i'm very, very anti-social.
can't we change it? i mean, with all the rituals we have to go through, we really can't change the destiny of the dead... why don't we just bury them after death or cremate? it's much cheaper. we don't have to go to the bleeep (i bet you know what) during all saints/souls day... save us a lot of trouble, right???
i wish it's tomorrow already; at least i'm done doin' b.s. today.
my two cents.
is it really necessary to do all these ceremonies i'm about to immerse myself into? go to the mass (i'm not catholic), walk from the church all the way to the... ah! cemetery???! said it again! were young, the generation x people... open/broad-minded, liberated kind. why all the trouble? our modern world calls for practicality. and oh, can't we have a little consideration with others? you know, the traffic. i don't know about people of my age but when it comes to these places (the three mentioned), i'm very, very anti-social.
can't we change it? i mean, with all the rituals we have to go through, we really can't change the destiny of the dead... why don't we just bury them after death or cremate? it's much cheaper. we don't have to go to the bleeep (i bet you know what) during all saints/souls day... save us a lot of trouble, right???
i wish it's tomorrow already; at least i'm done doin' b.s. today.
my two cents.
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Neil's unadulterated moments...
this boy now has an email add, a friendster and soon a weblog... hehehe! keep it up neil! watch out for him on tv and in those huge billboards... coming soon! ü
ThE BraWL
it was a fun night turn into a brawl. names won't be mentioned inorder to protect the identity of the 'vics' (CSI's abb. for victims, you know..). me included. ü
i wasn't planning in going there last night since i was there last friday. went anyway after reading some mails at the office, down a cup of coffe and dropping by a wake, it was all systems go. my mind was all psych-up for the fun waiting at Bleeeeep (if you've been my fan, you'd know). and fun it was, at least for a few hours... 20:30 on my watch, arrived and saw my old buddy with his office friends. damn, these guys/gals are so engrossed with their cellphone! must be bored. a few sml's and my mouth's starting to kick-in... i thought i should do all the talking coz they seem to be bored talking to each other (they're officemates, what's new?).
my "old" friend whose career started from being a call agent to one of the biggest, huge and successful call center in cebu, if not the world (do i get some incentives here, dex? i'm promoting your call center... what's the what??? shoot, i just mention his name! ah nevermind), is now a supervisor! yes people he is now a certified, bonafied, petrified, mortified and glorified "mama sang!" hihihihi!! joke3x. he's in-charge of recruitment. advertisements, interviews, hirings, earns a hundred grand a month... the works, you know... are you with me??
i've been enticed by him (admit it paker), to join his dominion of linguistic proficient agents. maybe you? with all the advertisements we're getting about call centers, how nice they look - at those pictures on billboards... ahhh, the allure of a call center agent these days.
back to our main topic which is the brawl last night. (whew! do i hear you say, "enough with the b.s.!", "let's get it on!"??) so, there we are, talking how it is to be call center agent, that it is such a challenging task. imagine talking to some morons and getting over that survey and make sure it's "complete" and how important it is to answer the phone every three seconds... kewl huh? not only that, they also have to press a button if they wanna pass-up for a while because their throat had not receive ample supply of saliva for the last eight hours, and they just wanna say to that last guy surveyed, "you suck! you have bad breath and bad english! are you from the philippines??!! f--k you very much!" not to mention, they also need to converse within the confines of the office in english or you will be fined... otherwise, their supervisors will know they did not follow proper procedures and somebody's gonna get fayerd!
tell me, wasn't that fun and great conversation??
i also had a lot of chit-chat in between our "tribute" to that closed department store with my best-bud and jon "the licker" (coz he's got funny ways of playing with his tongue). well, my best-bud told me about an unfortunate incident the other night of which i wasn't privy to. in fact we weren't. our partners were. i was hoping the guys who were offended won't make mountains out of a mole hill of that incident. our partners were drunk and were fed-up with all the talks and gossips going around.... they were itchin' to crack... boooom!!
to make this already thrilling and chilling story a bit shorter, the employer of that guy our partner challenged to a fist-fight last friday, approached me, apparently loaded, not with guns but alcohol, and ask me what's the story. i told him my best-bud was here that night and i wasn't, talk to him. two people, with alcohol running down their veins, it was just a matter of time and disaster waiting to happen... then, it became a heated exchange of filthy words. i knew it was trouble when he approached me so i stand-up, went where they are and acted as back-up. then this guy, who seem to have no business at all, butt-in and started to further heat things up. man, i would love lynching the face of that guy... his face spells trouble.... there was yelling and shoving and punches were thrown... what a night! and what a shame!
i don't know about you but i hate reading long stories... kidding aside, we settled some issues later but this is not the end of it, i'm sure. you want details? you know the drill....
i wasn't planning in going there last night since i was there last friday. went anyway after reading some mails at the office, down a cup of coffe and dropping by a wake, it was all systems go. my mind was all psych-up for the fun waiting at Bleeeeep (if you've been my fan, you'd know). and fun it was, at least for a few hours... 20:30 on my watch, arrived and saw my old buddy with his office friends. damn, these guys/gals are so engrossed with their cellphone! must be bored. a few sml's and my mouth's starting to kick-in... i thought i should do all the talking coz they seem to be bored talking to each other (they're officemates, what's new?).
my "old" friend whose career started from being a call agent to one of the biggest, huge and successful call center in cebu, if not the world (do i get some incentives here, dex? i'm promoting your call center... what's the what??? shoot, i just mention his name! ah nevermind), is now a supervisor! yes people he is now a certified, bonafied, petrified, mortified and glorified "mama sang!" hihihihi!! joke3x. he's in-charge of recruitment. advertisements, interviews, hirings, earns a hundred grand a month... the works, you know... are you with me??
i've been enticed by him (admit it paker), to join his dominion of linguistic proficient agents. maybe you? with all the advertisements we're getting about call centers, how nice they look - at those pictures on billboards... ahhh, the allure of a call center agent these days.
back to our main topic which is the brawl last night. (whew! do i hear you say, "enough with the b.s.!", "let's get it on!"??) so, there we are, talking how it is to be call center agent, that it is such a challenging task. imagine talking to some morons and getting over that survey and make sure it's "complete" and how important it is to answer the phone every three seconds... kewl huh? not only that, they also have to press a button if they wanna pass-up for a while because their throat had not receive ample supply of saliva for the last eight hours, and they just wanna say to that last guy surveyed, "you suck! you have bad breath and bad english! are you from the philippines??!! f--k you very much!" not to mention, they also need to converse within the confines of the office in english or you will be fined... otherwise, their supervisors will know they did not follow proper procedures and somebody's gonna get fayerd!
tell me, wasn't that fun and great conversation??
i also had a lot of chit-chat in between our "tribute" to that closed department store with my best-bud and jon "the licker" (coz he's got funny ways of playing with his tongue). well, my best-bud told me about an unfortunate incident the other night of which i wasn't privy to. in fact we weren't. our partners were. i was hoping the guys who were offended won't make mountains out of a mole hill of that incident. our partners were drunk and were fed-up with all the talks and gossips going around.... they were itchin' to crack... boooom!!
to make this already thrilling and chilling story a bit shorter, the employer of that guy our partner challenged to a fist-fight last friday, approached me, apparently loaded, not with guns but alcohol, and ask me what's the story. i told him my best-bud was here that night and i wasn't, talk to him. two people, with alcohol running down their veins, it was just a matter of time and disaster waiting to happen... then, it became a heated exchange of filthy words. i knew it was trouble when he approached me so i stand-up, went where they are and acted as back-up. then this guy, who seem to have no business at all, butt-in and started to further heat things up. man, i would love lynching the face of that guy... his face spells trouble.... there was yelling and shoving and punches were thrown... what a night! and what a shame!
i don't know about you but i hate reading long stories... kidding aside, we settled some issues later but this is not the end of it, i'm sure. you want details? you know the drill....
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Amusing
[i know i made a lot mistakes with my spelling and grammar but if you can forgive the person who wrote below, me, how much more?? üüü]
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg .The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer inwaht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the
wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was
ipmorantt!
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg .The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer inwaht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the
wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was
ipmorantt!
Friday, March 17, 2006
friendster frenzy
i am in "add as friend" mania at friendster. if you happened to be one of my victims, please stay calm. consider yourselves fortunate for i have seen something peculiar about you that interest me.
however, even if i expect you to accept my friendship arms-wide-open, some of you will reject me. i accept rejections like a man. however, there are times, due to lack of proper and right medication, i could be wild and violent with my reaction.
thus, i implore you, please accept my friendship for i am a man of peace. the last time i committed murder was two weeks ago and i have been sober eversince. thank you for your kindness.
peace ♥
however, even if i expect you to accept my friendship arms-wide-open, some of you will reject me. i accept rejections like a man. however, there are times, due to lack of proper and right medication, i could be wild and violent with my reaction.
thus, i implore you, please accept my friendship for i am a man of peace. the last time i committed murder was two weeks ago and i have been sober eversince. thank you for your kindness.
peace ♥
Thursday, March 16, 2006
My Pads
another day, another story to tell. my muscles are aching. thanks to that "wall to wall" workout i had yesterday. i love the pain. it simply means, i push myself really hard. i needed that anyway.
last night, while i was listening to mp3's on my pc, i remember downloading some "oldies" music. played it. man, i remember my dad. now, i really miss my dad. my recollection of him when he was still around just came alive again. he would sit on his favorite chair and listen to those musics i played last night. all of a sudden, my eyes were in tears... i did not cry when my bro-in-law died recently nor was even closed to tears but with that old music, it was like yesterday again... during my elementary days... he would listen to his favorite music with our phono turntable player, downstairs in our sala, sit on a nice chair with his favorite beer on the table. i remembered the days me and my bro tag along wherever he goes... at the customs, pier, cockfight arena, his friends' house.... fetch us after school. too old to be crying like a baby but.... can't stop it. i recall asking God why He took my dad so early. what could have happened to us if he were alive today...
sigh. i'll never know the answer. but one thing i do know, me and my siblings learn a lot from that experience. that there are two sides to everything. that every cloud has a silver lining, that hardships do make you strong and better person. my sister became a strong-willed woman and her faith in God is quite contagious. i drew a lot of strength from her. my younger bro, we're proud of what he's accomplished. most of the things he endeavored in life, for as long as he puts his mind into it, he succeeded. as for me, i can't tell. i can't measure my success but considering what i've went through (you have no idea), i'm just happy and thankful where i am now.
it would have been great if our lives would be like those fantasy books we read during grade school... live happily ever after.... but we live in a real world and in this life, nothing's perfect.
well, that's my little epiphany.
last night, while i was listening to mp3's on my pc, i remember downloading some "oldies" music. played it. man, i remember my dad. now, i really miss my dad. my recollection of him when he was still around just came alive again. he would sit on his favorite chair and listen to those musics i played last night. all of a sudden, my eyes were in tears... i did not cry when my bro-in-law died recently nor was even closed to tears but with that old music, it was like yesterday again... during my elementary days... he would listen to his favorite music with our phono turntable player, downstairs in our sala, sit on a nice chair with his favorite beer on the table. i remembered the days me and my bro tag along wherever he goes... at the customs, pier, cockfight arena, his friends' house.... fetch us after school. too old to be crying like a baby but.... can't stop it. i recall asking God why He took my dad so early. what could have happened to us if he were alive today...
sigh. i'll never know the answer. but one thing i do know, me and my siblings learn a lot from that experience. that there are two sides to everything. that every cloud has a silver lining, that hardships do make you strong and better person. my sister became a strong-willed woman and her faith in God is quite contagious. i drew a lot of strength from her. my younger bro, we're proud of what he's accomplished. most of the things he endeavored in life, for as long as he puts his mind into it, he succeeded. as for me, i can't tell. i can't measure my success but considering what i've went through (you have no idea), i'm just happy and thankful where i am now.
it would have been great if our lives would be like those fantasy books we read during grade school... live happily ever after.... but we live in a real world and in this life, nothing's perfect.
well, that's my little epiphany.
Pirates of the Carribean II
(got this from another blog who grab it from the manila standard site... let's talk about politics, shall we?)
From www.manilastandardtoday.com
Lowdown
column by Jojo Robles
Friday, March 03, 2006
A different view From a reader, who refuses to be identified, comes this compelling e-mail. It presents a fresh viewpoint on the current situation and deserves to see print:
Dear Tita Cory, senators, congressmen, businessmen, media people, leftists, and all bleeding hearts out there, I am angry. And I know that there are many out there who are angrier than I am for the same reason. And that reason is simple. I am sick and tired of all you guys claiming to speak for me and many Filipinos.
I feel like screaming every time you mouth words about fighting for my freedom and my rights, when you obviously are just thinking about yours. You tell me that the essence of democracy is providing every citizen the right to speak his or her mind and make his or her own informed judgments, but you yourselves do not respect my silence and the choices I and many others have made. In other words, your concept of democracy is limited to having your rights and your freedoms respected, at the expense of ours.
I am utterly flabbergasted that you still do not get it: we already responded to your calls, and our response has been very clear —we chose not to heed your calls to go to Edsa or to Fort Bonifacio not because we do not love our country or our freedoms or our rights, but precisely because we love our country even more. Because quite frankly, we are prepared to lose our freedoms and our rights just to move this country forward. You may think that is not correct, you can tell me all the dire warnings about the evils of authoritarian rule, but quite frankly all we see is your pathetic efforts to prop up your cause. You tell me that you are simply protecting my freedoms and my rights, but who told you to do that? I assure you that when I feel that my rights and my freedoms are at a peril, I will stand up and fight for them myself.
You tell us that GMA is not the right person to lead this country because she has done immoral acts. As someone who sees immorality being committed wantonly in many ways every day and by everyone (yes, including you), I may have become jaded. But you have not been able to offer me any viable alternative, while GMA has bent over backwards many times to accommodate you while continuing to work hard despite all the obstacles and the brickbats you have thrown her way. From where I sit, she is the one who has been working really hard to move this country forward while all of you have been so busy with one and only one thing: to make sure she does not succeed. So forgive me if I do not want to join you in your moral pissing contest. Forgive me if I have chosen to see things from another perspective.
You say she is the problem. I say, we are the problem; more to the point, I think you are a bigger problem than she is. Taking her out may solve part of the problem, but that leaves us with a bigger problem: you. That is right, you!
While I felt outraged that she called a Comelec official during the elections and that she may have rigged the elections, I have since then taken the higher moral ground and forgiven her. Yes, my dear bishops, I have done what you have told me to do since I was a child, which you say is the Christian and moral thing to do: forgive. Especially since she has asked for forgiveness and has tried to make amends for it. Erap certainly has not apologized and continues to be defiant, continuing to insult us every day with his protestations. Cory has not apologized for her incompetence but we have forgiven her just the same because like GMA, she has worked hard, after all.
I know you think that GMA’s apology was not enough, or that she was insincere, or that that apology should not be the end of it, but please spare me the hypocrisy of telling me that you do so for the sake of protecting the moral fiber of society. The real reason is because you smell blood and want to go for the kill.
Well, I have news for you. I do not like her, too. I did not even vote for her. I voted for Raul Roco. But as much as I do not like her, I do not like you even more. I may not trust her, but guess what: I do not trust you even more.
You know why? Because all you do is whine and sabotage this country. You belittle every little progress we make; conveniently forgetting that it is not just GMA who has been working so hard to achieve them.
Every single day, we keep the faith burning in our hearts that this country will finally pull itself out of the mess and we work so hard to do that. Every little progress is the result of our collective effort, we who toil hard every day in our jobs. Yet, you persist in one and only thing: making GMA look bad in the eyes of the world and making sure that this country continues to suffer to prove your sorry point. In the process, you continue to destroy what we painstakingly try to build. So please do not be surprised that I do not share your cause. Do not be surprised that we have become contemptuous of your antics. You have moved heaven and earth to destroy her credibility, you have convened all kinds of fora and hearings and all you have done is test our patience to the core. For all your effort, you have only succeeded in dragging us further down. I say enough.
Don’t get me wrong. I am not asking that we take immorality lying down, or that we let the President get away with anything illegal. But you have tried to prove your accusations all this time and you have not succeeded, so it is time to let things be. Besides, you are doing something immoral as well if not utterly unforgivable. The Magdalo soldiers are consorting with the communists—the same people who have been trying to kill democracy for years. Cory has been consorting with Erap and the Marcoses.
So please wake up and take a reality check. In the absence of true and genuine moral leadership, many of us have decided to cast our lot with the President, even if we do not like her. A flawed leader is better than scheming power-hungry fools who cannot even stand up for their convictions in the face of an impending arrest.
Your coup attempts and the denials that you have consequently made only underscored what we think is true: you are spineless and unreliable people whose only defense is to cry suppression when your ruse does not work. You are like bullies who taunt and provoke, but cry oppression when taken to task for your cruelty.
I would have respected you if you took the consequences of your actions like real heroes: calmly and responsibly instead of kicking and screaming and making lame excuses. You say you are willing to die for us, that you do all these things for the country and the Filipino, but you are not even willing to go to jail for us.
Come on, you really think we believe that you did not want to bring down the government when that is the one and only thing you have been trying to do in the last many months?
We love this country and we want peace and progress. Many among us do not give a f—k who sits at Malacañang because we will work hard and do our share to make things work. If you only do your jobs, the ones that we elected you to do, things would be a lot simpler and easier for every one.
The events during the weekend only proved one thing. You are more dangerous and a serious threat to this country than GMA is. We have seen what you are capable of doing—you are ready to burn this country and reduce everything to ashes just to prove your point. If there is something that we need protection from, it is protection from you.
From www.manilastandardtoday.com
Lowdown
column by Jojo Robles
Friday, March 03, 2006
A different view From a reader, who refuses to be identified, comes this compelling e-mail. It presents a fresh viewpoint on the current situation and deserves to see print:
Dear Tita Cory, senators, congressmen, businessmen, media people, leftists, and all bleeding hearts out there, I am angry. And I know that there are many out there who are angrier than I am for the same reason. And that reason is simple. I am sick and tired of all you guys claiming to speak for me and many Filipinos.
I feel like screaming every time you mouth words about fighting for my freedom and my rights, when you obviously are just thinking about yours. You tell me that the essence of democracy is providing every citizen the right to speak his or her mind and make his or her own informed judgments, but you yourselves do not respect my silence and the choices I and many others have made. In other words, your concept of democracy is limited to having your rights and your freedoms respected, at the expense of ours.
I am utterly flabbergasted that you still do not get it: we already responded to your calls, and our response has been very clear —we chose not to heed your calls to go to Edsa or to Fort Bonifacio not because we do not love our country or our freedoms or our rights, but precisely because we love our country even more. Because quite frankly, we are prepared to lose our freedoms and our rights just to move this country forward. You may think that is not correct, you can tell me all the dire warnings about the evils of authoritarian rule, but quite frankly all we see is your pathetic efforts to prop up your cause. You tell me that you are simply protecting my freedoms and my rights, but who told you to do that? I assure you that when I feel that my rights and my freedoms are at a peril, I will stand up and fight for them myself.
You tell us that GMA is not the right person to lead this country because she has done immoral acts. As someone who sees immorality being committed wantonly in many ways every day and by everyone (yes, including you), I may have become jaded. But you have not been able to offer me any viable alternative, while GMA has bent over backwards many times to accommodate you while continuing to work hard despite all the obstacles and the brickbats you have thrown her way. From where I sit, she is the one who has been working really hard to move this country forward while all of you have been so busy with one and only one thing: to make sure she does not succeed. So forgive me if I do not want to join you in your moral pissing contest. Forgive me if I have chosen to see things from another perspective.
You say she is the problem. I say, we are the problem; more to the point, I think you are a bigger problem than she is. Taking her out may solve part of the problem, but that leaves us with a bigger problem: you. That is right, you!
While I felt outraged that she called a Comelec official during the elections and that she may have rigged the elections, I have since then taken the higher moral ground and forgiven her. Yes, my dear bishops, I have done what you have told me to do since I was a child, which you say is the Christian and moral thing to do: forgive. Especially since she has asked for forgiveness and has tried to make amends for it. Erap certainly has not apologized and continues to be defiant, continuing to insult us every day with his protestations. Cory has not apologized for her incompetence but we have forgiven her just the same because like GMA, she has worked hard, after all.
I know you think that GMA’s apology was not enough, or that she was insincere, or that that apology should not be the end of it, but please spare me the hypocrisy of telling me that you do so for the sake of protecting the moral fiber of society. The real reason is because you smell blood and want to go for the kill.
Well, I have news for you. I do not like her, too. I did not even vote for her. I voted for Raul Roco. But as much as I do not like her, I do not like you even more. I may not trust her, but guess what: I do not trust you even more.
You know why? Because all you do is whine and sabotage this country. You belittle every little progress we make; conveniently forgetting that it is not just GMA who has been working so hard to achieve them.
Every single day, we keep the faith burning in our hearts that this country will finally pull itself out of the mess and we work so hard to do that. Every little progress is the result of our collective effort, we who toil hard every day in our jobs. Yet, you persist in one and only thing: making GMA look bad in the eyes of the world and making sure that this country continues to suffer to prove your sorry point. In the process, you continue to destroy what we painstakingly try to build. So please do not be surprised that I do not share your cause. Do not be surprised that we have become contemptuous of your antics. You have moved heaven and earth to destroy her credibility, you have convened all kinds of fora and hearings and all you have done is test our patience to the core. For all your effort, you have only succeeded in dragging us further down. I say enough.
Don’t get me wrong. I am not asking that we take immorality lying down, or that we let the President get away with anything illegal. But you have tried to prove your accusations all this time and you have not succeeded, so it is time to let things be. Besides, you are doing something immoral as well if not utterly unforgivable. The Magdalo soldiers are consorting with the communists—the same people who have been trying to kill democracy for years. Cory has been consorting with Erap and the Marcoses.
So please wake up and take a reality check. In the absence of true and genuine moral leadership, many of us have decided to cast our lot with the President, even if we do not like her. A flawed leader is better than scheming power-hungry fools who cannot even stand up for their convictions in the face of an impending arrest.
Your coup attempts and the denials that you have consequently made only underscored what we think is true: you are spineless and unreliable people whose only defense is to cry suppression when your ruse does not work. You are like bullies who taunt and provoke, but cry oppression when taken to task for your cruelty.
I would have respected you if you took the consequences of your actions like real heroes: calmly and responsibly instead of kicking and screaming and making lame excuses. You say you are willing to die for us, that you do all these things for the country and the Filipino, but you are not even willing to go to jail for us.
Come on, you really think we believe that you did not want to bring down the government when that is the one and only thing you have been trying to do in the last many months?
We love this country and we want peace and progress. Many among us do not give a f—k who sits at Malacañang because we will work hard and do our share to make things work. If you only do your jobs, the ones that we elected you to do, things would be a lot simpler and easier for every one.
The events during the weekend only proved one thing. You are more dangerous and a serious threat to this country than GMA is. We have seen what you are capable of doing—you are ready to burn this country and reduce everything to ashes just to prove your point. If there is something that we need protection from, it is protection from you.
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
surfin' the www
i've been browsing through the web - blogs, news, almost everything that caught my attention. click. having the net was good as gold for me. most of the information you and i need are be found in the net. you don't need to be a tech•ie savvy to learn the ropes, just a little more than curiousity. fun, isn't it?
but... it can be utterly time-consuming. "time flies when you're having fun" NU107 radio filler says that all the time.... i know for a fact that playing chess is such a waste of time... nay, "time-eaters"(unless you're in a tourney that use timers). mister chess-moso; don't write me up.
so, what's the difference between web surfing and playing chess? i bet you know.
well, let's have the similarity - gain more knowledge, time-consuming... blah, blah, blah [can't think of any]
time to work it out. sweat and stop the addiction my friend. coz really, what you're doin' is unproductive and that don't move much of your muscle, chump!
now, where's that tae-bo disk my sista gave me??
but... it can be utterly time-consuming. "time flies when you're having fun" NU107 radio filler says that all the time.... i know for a fact that playing chess is such a waste of time... nay, "time-eaters"(unless you're in a tourney that use timers). mister chess-moso; don't write me up.
so, what's the difference between web surfing and playing chess? i bet you know.
well, let's have the similarity - gain more knowledge, time-consuming... blah, blah, blah [can't think of any]
time to work it out. sweat and stop the addiction my friend. coz really, what you're doin' is unproductive and that don't move much of your muscle, chump!
now, where's that tae-bo disk my sista gave me??
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
don't read this B.S.
i have a problem with boredom. see, i'm easily bored. i always feel the need to do something... read, watch, play, write... or anything to keep my mind busy... or weariness strikes in. in fact, i'm bored with this topic already!
i find it important to accomplish something in a day, though. i mean, there must be a purpose for us, to have lived another day in this world. otherwise, what's the point of living, right? i am trying to find out the reason for my existence... if i live long enough, that would be for me to see my son, neil, grow and accomplish more, be better than us... see my bro., alan, again... get the family together once more... be super rich, perhaps... and nothing else.... but i don't hold nor can i see the future... i am, therefore, insecured. call me a pessimist but we are but a moment's sunlight, fading in the grass... we can die in our sleep or in a snap of finger... but wait! where the heck is this serious narration going to????
dude, get back to earth!
well, cheer up! my other main man, louie texted me earlier.... brag that our tent at beach roots is now in place! can't wait to go bro... kiss my sad-face goodbye and let the good times roll.... yahooo!! by the way, a huge thank you goes to elvin for making this happened.... whatchawaitinfor??? let's go to BEACH ROOTS, PARTY PIPOL!
i find it important to accomplish something in a day, though. i mean, there must be a purpose for us, to have lived another day in this world. otherwise, what's the point of living, right? i am trying to find out the reason for my existence... if i live long enough, that would be for me to see my son, neil, grow and accomplish more, be better than us... see my bro., alan, again... get the family together once more... be super rich, perhaps... and nothing else.... but i don't hold nor can i see the future... i am, therefore, insecured. call me a pessimist but we are but a moment's sunlight, fading in the grass... we can die in our sleep or in a snap of finger... but wait! where the heck is this serious narration going to????
dude, get back to earth!
well, cheer up! my other main man, louie texted me earlier.... brag that our tent at beach roots is now in place! can't wait to go bro... kiss my sad-face goodbye and let the good times roll.... yahooo!! by the way, a huge thank you goes to elvin for making this happened.... whatchawaitinfor??? let's go to BEACH ROOTS, PARTY PIPOL!
Sunday, March 12, 2006
Where Has The Love Gone?
(today's supposed to be "no internet day".... got to fight the urge.... even though i'm busier than a one-legged man in an ass kickin contest, i'm gonna be dull as dishwater without it... done with work, anyway. i came across this kewl essay from Arun Sobti.... read on....)
“Marriages are made in heaven,” so they say, but surely they are broken on earth and how! The ever-increasing number of broken marriages and divorces that are occurring all around us certainly do not give credence to the opening statement, for if indeed something is made in heaven, it cannot be so fragile, flimsy and temporary. Are those marriages that flounder really made in heaven? Why is it that two people in love, having got married after braving all odds and adversities, find it so difficult to continue their relationship and end up at the altar of divorce?
At the very outset we must realize that no two people are completely alike and that everyone has a background that is completely unique. The basic nature and upbringing of an individual shapes the person’s outlook and attitude.
When two people meet, fall in love and get married, the initial period of living together is engulfed by a cloud of infatuation, physical attraction and the novelty of this particular phase of life. Gradually the veil of euphoria disappears and both the partners begin to show their true colors. Innumerable problems start, based mostly on ego clashes of the two individuals. They overlook the fact that they should not consider themselves to be two separate individuals but a team that has to traverse the journey of life together, appreciating each other’s shortcomings and trying to make up for the same.
Very often it has been seen that people fall apart on the flimsiest of grounds and by the time they realize their follies, it is already too late. The marriage has hit the rocks and both the partners have gone their own way whereas a little introspection at the right stage might have saved the wedlock.
Another important reason for the breakup of marriages is professional rivalry. With the advent of higher education being pursued by both the sexes at an equal pace, the subsequent professional competence being acquired by both, and in a bid to be the best in this competitive world, respect for each other in a marriage is thrown to the winds. Obviously, when both partners start devoting their maximum time and energy to “conquering the world,” the home front has to suffer. The seeds of discord start brewing and one thing leads to another with the result that both land up in court seeking a divorce. If only one of them had made a few sacrifices and complemented the other’s shortcomings, things would not have come to such a passé. However, this does not normally happen as most males have this chauvinistic approach and attitude and as such they feel that they are not expected to bow down in any situation.
On the other hand, the present day females are also ‘liberated’ and do not accept male dominance which makes them unwilling to sacrifice their lifestyles or careers. There lies the crux of the problem.
Sometimes, family environment and unnecessary interference from the immediate members of the family also act as a catalyst to worsen the situation. The mother-in-law syndrome could also come into play and if not tackled adeptly, can lead to disastrous consequences.
Infidelity on the part of either or both partners is also a likely cause for upsetting a marriage. Innumerable marriages have broken up even on the premises of unrealistic doubts about each other.
Lastly, the problem of separation gets accentuated when there are children involved who have to suffer due to no fault of theirs. Would it not be prudent on the part of the parents to stop and consider the ill effects on the children, before taking a plunge in the deep sea of divorce?
“Marriages are made in heaven,” so they say, but surely they are broken on earth and how! The ever-increasing number of broken marriages and divorces that are occurring all around us certainly do not give credence to the opening statement, for if indeed something is made in heaven, it cannot be so fragile, flimsy and temporary. Are those marriages that flounder really made in heaven? Why is it that two people in love, having got married after braving all odds and adversities, find it so difficult to continue their relationship and end up at the altar of divorce?
At the very outset we must realize that no two people are completely alike and that everyone has a background that is completely unique. The basic nature and upbringing of an individual shapes the person’s outlook and attitude.
When two people meet, fall in love and get married, the initial period of living together is engulfed by a cloud of infatuation, physical attraction and the novelty of this particular phase of life. Gradually the veil of euphoria disappears and both the partners begin to show their true colors. Innumerable problems start, based mostly on ego clashes of the two individuals. They overlook the fact that they should not consider themselves to be two separate individuals but a team that has to traverse the journey of life together, appreciating each other’s shortcomings and trying to make up for the same.
Very often it has been seen that people fall apart on the flimsiest of grounds and by the time they realize their follies, it is already too late. The marriage has hit the rocks and both the partners have gone their own way whereas a little introspection at the right stage might have saved the wedlock.
Another important reason for the breakup of marriages is professional rivalry. With the advent of higher education being pursued by both the sexes at an equal pace, the subsequent professional competence being acquired by both, and in a bid to be the best in this competitive world, respect for each other in a marriage is thrown to the winds. Obviously, when both partners start devoting their maximum time and energy to “conquering the world,” the home front has to suffer. The seeds of discord start brewing and one thing leads to another with the result that both land up in court seeking a divorce. If only one of them had made a few sacrifices and complemented the other’s shortcomings, things would not have come to such a passé. However, this does not normally happen as most males have this chauvinistic approach and attitude and as such they feel that they are not expected to bow down in any situation.
On the other hand, the present day females are also ‘liberated’ and do not accept male dominance which makes them unwilling to sacrifice their lifestyles or careers. There lies the crux of the problem.
Sometimes, family environment and unnecessary interference from the immediate members of the family also act as a catalyst to worsen the situation. The mother-in-law syndrome could also come into play and if not tackled adeptly, can lead to disastrous consequences.
Infidelity on the part of either or both partners is also a likely cause for upsetting a marriage. Innumerable marriages have broken up even on the premises of unrealistic doubts about each other.
Lastly, the problem of separation gets accentuated when there are children involved who have to suffer due to no fault of theirs. Would it not be prudent on the part of the parents to stop and consider the ill effects on the children, before taking a plunge in the deep sea of divorce?
Friday, March 10, 2006
Friday, I'm in love
last night was fun. me, louie, his friend (forgot your name bro), dexter b. were there chatting at beach roots. talking some guy stuffs you know... at the other entrance/exit of mango square mall, there was a motorcycle exhibit. i was pretty late with the news and the show a foreigner did earlier. he made a burnout of his big bike. miss it. have to take care of neil coz his momma's out doin' errands. at 9pm, finally, my "main man" hit the sack....Zzzzzzzz
time for fun. it's friday. can't stay home watch tv on a friday night. beach rootin' time. lots of peps are there by then. sure enough, our regulars ... yul (our flirtatious GRO/PR guy) and friends, jon, his cousin, earl and elvin - b.r. partners, were there. at 10pm, half loaded i presume. i sit with louie and his friend. dex b. arrived shortly.
SUDDENLY(!!), three girls and two guys sit 3m from where we are. 12' o'clock, i signalled to my "gulp" buddies... what a sight to behold! a lady in black. young, sexy and beautiful. from where i was seated, i lost my virginity.. errrr concentation with our discussion. nice view. guess what she's drinking? red horse! hard to believe that girls you see at the mall, church, you know, the girl next door kindda is actually wild!
after a lot of quick, unnoticeable stares from all of us, reality sink in. "i'm too old for this sh!t!" roger murtaugh mouths-off in the movie, lethal weapon. that's what we are. i refuse to believe. what?? old?? excuses, excuses. well, dex b. gave us something to ponder - "when you're young, you romanticize. when you're old, you fantasize" heck, that's right on the money, dude!!
12:45am. got to go or i'm gonna get ugly like cinderella. ugly at work, that is, for lack of sleep. goodbye gorgeous girl. i'll forget about you tomorrow. i'm a family man, you know. sorry guys, i don't bid goodbyes. you might follow and beach roots becomes a ghost bar. gone in 59 seconds...
lesson here? none. we'll never learn.... just another ordinary friday night bloated to drive a point (now, where did i put those smiley's). but i got to say there's a world of difference between having a big crush on somebody and falling in love. we probably have hundreds of people we admire. i for one easily fall for people who are shiny, happy people(r.e.m.), great sense of humor, big boobs (kidding), simple, complicated, mysterious (mao mani naa sa ako prenster!) and most and very important of all, sensible.
but falling in-love? that's another great story to tell...
enough with the chit-chat noldy, time for work.
time for fun. it's friday. can't stay home watch tv on a friday night. beach rootin' time. lots of peps are there by then. sure enough, our regulars ... yul (our flirtatious GRO/PR guy) and friends, jon, his cousin, earl and elvin - b.r. partners, were there. at 10pm, half loaded i presume. i sit with louie and his friend. dex b. arrived shortly.
SUDDENLY(!!), three girls and two guys sit 3m from where we are. 12' o'clock, i signalled to my "gulp" buddies... what a sight to behold! a lady in black. young, sexy and beautiful. from where i was seated, i lost my virginity.. errrr concentation with our discussion. nice view. guess what she's drinking? red horse! hard to believe that girls you see at the mall, church, you know, the girl next door kindda is actually wild!
after a lot of quick, unnoticeable stares from all of us, reality sink in. "i'm too old for this sh!t!" roger murtaugh mouths-off in the movie, lethal weapon. that's what we are. i refuse to believe. what?? old?? excuses, excuses. well, dex b. gave us something to ponder - "when you're young, you romanticize. when you're old, you fantasize" heck, that's right on the money, dude!!
12:45am. got to go or i'm gonna get ugly like cinderella. ugly at work, that is, for lack of sleep. goodbye gorgeous girl. i'll forget about you tomorrow. i'm a family man, you know. sorry guys, i don't bid goodbyes. you might follow and beach roots becomes a ghost bar. gone in 59 seconds...
lesson here? none. we'll never learn.... just another ordinary friday night bloated to drive a point (now, where did i put those smiley's). but i got to say there's a world of difference between having a big crush on somebody and falling in love. we probably have hundreds of people we admire. i for one easily fall for people who are shiny, happy people(r.e.m.), great sense of humor, big boobs (kidding), simple, complicated, mysterious (mao mani naa sa ako prenster!) and most and very important of all, sensible.
but falling in-love? that's another great story to tell...
enough with the chit-chat noldy, time for work.
Boosting Metabolism: 10 Tips That Work
by Susan Woodward for MSN Health & Fitness
Metabolism. Simply put, it’s the process by which the body makes and uses energy (calories) for everything from the cellular absorption of nutrients to running a marathon.
Sounds like pretty boring science on paper. Except that knowing how to efficiently metabolize calories could translate into a healthier body.
Whether you’re trying to lose extra pounds or preparing for the inevitable metabolic slowing that comes with age, here are some surefire ways to boost your metabolism to keep your energy pulsating and your body in shape.
1. Build lean body mass. As mentioned above, metabolism slows as we age – by as much as two percent a year! But there is something you can do to counterbalance nature. “Muscle is the single most important predictor or how well you metabolize your food, how well you burn calories and burn body fat,” insists Shari Lieberman, author of Dare to Lose. Strength training with dumbbells or resistance bands at least twice a week is essential to boosting your metabolism. Repeat – essential. And here’s the really good news: Your metabolism stays pumped for many hours after you finish your workout.
2. Get moving. You know the drill, but here’s a reminder. At least 30 to 60 minutes of walking, jogging, cycling, swimming or some other form of aerobic exercise a minimum of three times a week is the other half of the exercise equation. “People don’t like to hear it but you have got to exercise,” says Lieberman.
3. Eat. It may sound crazy to those trying to lose weight by severely restricting their daily caloric intake, but the problem with this old school of thought, explains Michigan dietician Julie Beyer, is that it actually slows metabolism. “Every cell of the body is like a flashlight bulb,” she explains. “When our bodies don’t get enough food, or fuel, every cell burns less brightly.” Recent studies show that eating smaller meals every three to four hours aids metabolism and weight loss.
4. Ditch the sugar. Of course, you still have to make good choices about what you eat. “When you eat sugar you throw your metabolic switch into fat storage mode,” says Lieberman, who suggests a predominately low glycemic index diet, meaning foods that, unlike sugars, are broken down gradually to help maintain an even blood-sugar level.
5. Don’t skip breakfast. It’s a fact that people who eat a healthy breakfast are skinnier than people who don’t. And try to think outside the box. A breakfast bowl of vegetables and brown rice is a great way to kick-start your metabolism for the day.
6. Include hot foods. If Mexican and Thai are favorites, you’re in luck. “Spicy food that has hot peppers in it appears to boost metabolism,” Lieberman says.
7. Drink green tea. “There are unhealthy things that can boost your metabolism, like a really strong cup of coffee, or nicotine, but I would never say go have a cigarette!” says Michelle Streif, a personal trainer in Nebraska. Nor overdo it on caffeine, which also has undesirable side effects. Instead, go for green tea, says Lieberman, which is known to stimulate metabolism longer and more effectively than coffee.
8. Don’t forget H2O. Staying well hydrated is essential to flushing the body of toxic byproducts that are released when fat is burned. Cold water may also give your metabolism at least a small boost because energy is required to heat the body.
9. Avoid stress. At all costs. “Stress can actually cause weight gain, particularly around the tummy,” says Lieberman. Why? Because physical and emotional stress activates the release of cortisol, a steroid that slows metabolism.
10. Sleep. Research shows that people who don’t sleep for seven to eight hours a night are more prone to weight gain. Additionally, we now know that lean muscle is regenerated in the final couple of hours of sleep each night, says Beyer. Which takes you right back to tip number one!
Metabolism. Simply put, it’s the process by which the body makes and uses energy (calories) for everything from the cellular absorption of nutrients to running a marathon.
Sounds like pretty boring science on paper. Except that knowing how to efficiently metabolize calories could translate into a healthier body.
Whether you’re trying to lose extra pounds or preparing for the inevitable metabolic slowing that comes with age, here are some surefire ways to boost your metabolism to keep your energy pulsating and your body in shape.
1. Build lean body mass. As mentioned above, metabolism slows as we age – by as much as two percent a year! But there is something you can do to counterbalance nature. “Muscle is the single most important predictor or how well you metabolize your food, how well you burn calories and burn body fat,” insists Shari Lieberman, author of Dare to Lose. Strength training with dumbbells or resistance bands at least twice a week is essential to boosting your metabolism. Repeat – essential. And here’s the really good news: Your metabolism stays pumped for many hours after you finish your workout.
2. Get moving. You know the drill, but here’s a reminder. At least 30 to 60 minutes of walking, jogging, cycling, swimming or some other form of aerobic exercise a minimum of three times a week is the other half of the exercise equation. “People don’t like to hear it but you have got to exercise,” says Lieberman.
3. Eat. It may sound crazy to those trying to lose weight by severely restricting their daily caloric intake, but the problem with this old school of thought, explains Michigan dietician Julie Beyer, is that it actually slows metabolism. “Every cell of the body is like a flashlight bulb,” she explains. “When our bodies don’t get enough food, or fuel, every cell burns less brightly.” Recent studies show that eating smaller meals every three to four hours aids metabolism and weight loss.
4. Ditch the sugar. Of course, you still have to make good choices about what you eat. “When you eat sugar you throw your metabolic switch into fat storage mode,” says Lieberman, who suggests a predominately low glycemic index diet, meaning foods that, unlike sugars, are broken down gradually to help maintain an even blood-sugar level.
5. Don’t skip breakfast. It’s a fact that people who eat a healthy breakfast are skinnier than people who don’t. And try to think outside the box. A breakfast bowl of vegetables and brown rice is a great way to kick-start your metabolism for the day.
6. Include hot foods. If Mexican and Thai are favorites, you’re in luck. “Spicy food that has hot peppers in it appears to boost metabolism,” Lieberman says.
7. Drink green tea. “There are unhealthy things that can boost your metabolism, like a really strong cup of coffee, or nicotine, but I would never say go have a cigarette!” says Michelle Streif, a personal trainer in Nebraska. Nor overdo it on caffeine, which also has undesirable side effects. Instead, go for green tea, says Lieberman, which is known to stimulate metabolism longer and more effectively than coffee.
8. Don’t forget H2O. Staying well hydrated is essential to flushing the body of toxic byproducts that are released when fat is burned. Cold water may also give your metabolism at least a small boost because energy is required to heat the body.
9. Avoid stress. At all costs. “Stress can actually cause weight gain, particularly around the tummy,” says Lieberman. Why? Because physical and emotional stress activates the release of cortisol, a steroid that slows metabolism.
10. Sleep. Research shows that people who don’t sleep for seven to eight hours a night are more prone to weight gain. Additionally, we now know that lean muscle is regenerated in the final couple of hours of sleep each night, says Beyer. Which takes you right back to tip number one!
Thursday, March 09, 2006
Ode to the Nice Guy
(note: i get this from another blog... thought it was funny and cool...)
This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl's every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they're at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don't end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn't worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you'd ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn't have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing "serious" between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: "oh, but we're just friends!" And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you're nice like that.The nice guys don't often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don't seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can't. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as "oh, he's too nice to date" or "he would be a good boyfriend but he's not for me" or "he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn't possibly ask him out!" or the most frustrating of all: "no, it would ruin our friendship." Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can't figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I'm going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn't last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you're sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.
This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl's every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they're at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don't end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn't worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you'd ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn't have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing "serious" between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: "oh, but we're just friends!" And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you're nice like that.The nice guys don't often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don't seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can't. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as "oh, he's too nice to date" or "he would be a good boyfriend but he's not for me" or "he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn't possibly ask him out!" or the most frustrating of all: "no, it would ruin our friendship." Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can't figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I'm going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn't last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you're sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Thoughtless.... thought
well, i had quite a thought before i seated here to write something... i have a very bad memory. i can actually forget what you just said minutes ago. what could be wrong with my brain?? help!
if you haven't notice yet, most of the pix i upload here are motorcycles. ok, motorcycles and some sexy girls in their skimpy dress or underwears if you really wanna bust me...
i just love motorcycles. if i see a big bike, i'd stop and stare and get awed... i wonder how fast can it go... and the sound of the engine? they are music to my ears. i like dirt bikes too... the xlr 200 you see below(no, not the cbr below but the one way below... like seven page-downs), used to be mine. that bike, even with a small engine displacement, gets a lot of respect from everyone. i've won a lot of "spur of the moment" races with that bike and it never let me down. i miss that bike. three years of parnership and it's time to let "her" go. why? it's been raining like forever. with spiky tires it struts, mud flies everywhere. by the time i arrived at work, my shoes and my jeans could actually use some serious washing (like roger-washer does). sold it last january.
i'm back where i started. my first bike was a honda dream. an underbone. now, a suzuki smash. disappointing but ideal for our current weather... on a really bad weather, there's always a cage to drive. it's not bmw x5 or z4 nor a ford focus. not even a nissan maxima... but both can bring you from point A to B.
i hope, i could get me a ducati. my dream bike. i wouldn't mind a honda crf85r or a cbr and a yamaha fz6 or a v-max. for now, i'm stuck with my suzuki. dream big, it's free.
if you haven't notice yet, most of the pix i upload here are motorcycles. ok, motorcycles and some sexy girls in their skimpy dress or underwears if you really wanna bust me...
i just love motorcycles. if i see a big bike, i'd stop and stare and get awed... i wonder how fast can it go... and the sound of the engine? they are music to my ears. i like dirt bikes too... the xlr 200 you see below(no, not the cbr below but the one way below... like seven page-downs), used to be mine. that bike, even with a small engine displacement, gets a lot of respect from everyone. i've won a lot of "spur of the moment" races with that bike and it never let me down. i miss that bike. three years of parnership and it's time to let "her" go. why? it's been raining like forever. with spiky tires it struts, mud flies everywhere. by the time i arrived at work, my shoes and my jeans could actually use some serious washing (like roger-washer does). sold it last january.
i'm back where i started. my first bike was a honda dream. an underbone. now, a suzuki smash. disappointing but ideal for our current weather... on a really bad weather, there's always a cage to drive. it's not bmw x5 or z4 nor a ford focus. not even a nissan maxima... but both can bring you from point A to B.
i hope, i could get me a ducati. my dream bike. i wouldn't mind a honda crf85r or a cbr and a yamaha fz6 or a v-max. for now, i'm stuck with my suzuki. dream big, it's free.
Monday, March 06, 2006
21 Ways to Stick to a Workout
When resolutions waver, use these tips for motivation (we all could use some motivation, you know - noldski)
We heard you were ready for a gut-busting 2006. This would be the year you'd stick to your muscle-building, fat-burning covenant: the New Year's resolution. No missed days. No empty calories. No wimp-outs. No excuses.
No, really.
We still believe in you. Of the 16 percent of guys who resolve to work out more in the new year, however, 49 percent fail to adhere to their resolutions. We've heard all the excuses. (We've used a few ourselves.)
So we made a list of them—the lame and the understandable. Then we called around to psychologists, dietitians, trainers and men who manage to work out no matter how busy their lives are.
First, the legitimate excuses. We found four: You're sore, you're sick, you're exhausted, you're hurt. That's it.
Soreness means your body needs a break: "Recovery is as important as working out," says Carter Hays, C.S.C.S., a Houston-based personal trainer. Overtraining keeps as many men from reaching their goals as undertraining does, says Hays. An illness means you should knock off and let your body fight the bug. If you're so tired you're drowsy, you could hurt yourself. And if you're injured—especially if you're experiencing joint pain—let your body heal.
As for the rest of the excuses, listen up:
"Looks like rain." Men's Health cover model Gregg Avedon lives in Florida. Do the names Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne mean anything to you? Avedon spent much of 2004 lifting storm shutters and storing away patio furniture, then taking cover. He still looks great. Avedon says your home gym—those dumbbells over there, and your chinup bar—makes staying in a viable option. You can also spice up your indoor cardio by jumping rope or running up and down stairs. Or tie both ends of a resistance band to a doorway, place a towel across your chest, face away from the door with the band (cushioned by the towel) across your chest, and run in place.
"I have no time." Combine things you do anyway—work, breathe—with athletics. Set up business meetings during which you walk or jog; play tennis with your date; take a spin class to find dates; or take your family hiking, suggests Charles Stuart Platkin, M.P.H., author of The Automatic Diet.
"I pack my gym bag and then The O.C. comes on." Get TiVo. Then tell yourself you're going to do just half of your regular routine. "It won't seem so insurmountable, and you'll end up doing the whole workout," says Edward Abramson, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in Lafayette, California.
"I need my sleep." Pat Croce manages to stick with his workouts, and this father of two has been busy hosting his syndicated TV show, Pat Croce: Moving In, and opening a pirate museum in Key West, Florida. "Like me, you have to schedule fitness," he says. On the first of each month, Croce reviews his schedule with his secretary and then his wife, and breaks it down into weeks. Every Sunday, he goes over the coming week, making sure there are gyms at hotels where he'll be staying.
"I don't want to spend $50 a month on a gym membership." Don't. Now's the time to negotiate fees, trial months, or group discounts. Think you don't have the cash? Save $900 a year by switching from cafe mocha to metabolism-boosting green tea when you stop at Starbucks every morning.
"My gym sucks." So move. Changing gyms is an opportunity for you to upgrade your workout. See the next tip.
"I'm bored with my workout." "Throw it in reverse," says Gunnar Peterson, C.S.C.S., author of G-Force. If you always do lat pulldowns with an overhand grip, switch to underhand. Do a reverse-grip bench press, reverse-grip curls, reverse-grip triceps pushdowns. Do front squats, rear lunges, and dumbbell lateral raises with your palms up. Count backward, too. "It's like a blastoff," says Peterson: "5, 4, 3, 2, 1, done."
"I never see results." Maybe you're not looking in the right places. Measure your waist, your heart rate and your weight. Write them down. Then measure again after a week or two, says Croce. Celebrate even the smallest sign of progress. Muscles appear as fat melts.
"Four weeks, and no change in waistline, heart rate, or weight!" Whether you see results or not, you're strengthening your joints and connective tissues, which means you're laying down a foundation for future muscle growth, says Peterson. Your diet, stress, sleep patterns and other factors besides your workout may be holding you back—so don't give up.
"I have no energy." Eat. You need the fuel. "An active guy needs up to 1,000 calories more than an inactive guy," says Gay Riley, R.D.
"I'm just making sure my body is getting adequate time to recover." After 72 hours of rest, you're just sliding backward. "But are you actually giving yourself a chance to recover?" asks Peterson. It's not all about time. Mix L-glutamine into your postworkout shake and eat a diet full of omega-3 fatty acids; they can assist with cellular reconstruction and the removal of metabolic wastes to help you recover faster, Peterson says.
"I always get hurt." This happens when you ratchet up your workout. Focus on losing one pound at a time or boosting your weights in five-pound increments, says C.J. Murphy, M.F.S., owner of Total Performance Sports in Everett, Massachusetts. If you're used to doing 20 minutes on the treadmill, don't try a two-hour road run. If you bench-press 50-pound dumbbells, don't go for 90. Instead, make small increases in the difficulty of your workout, focus on form, and work with a spotter so you still have a safety net, Murphy says.
"My elbows/shins/pinkie toes hurt." "Pain is a sure sign something is awry with your exercise choices," says Murphy. This year, don't isolate body parts so much—your muscles should function as a team. If your shoulder hurts for a week after you do lateral raises, stop doing them. Find a variation that doesn't cause pain, he says.
"I don't want to look stupid trying to use those space-age machines." Approach new machines with enthusiasm. "That's a good way to broaden your fitness spectrum," says Peterson. Read the placard, ask a trainer for assistance, and give it a shot. Nobody's looking. "They're so into themselves that they're not even thinking about you," Peterson says.
"I'm bored again." Organize your workout differently for one to two weeks, says Peterson. Let's say you're usually a push-pull guy—you do chinups and leg curls one workout, bench presses and squats another. Try working antagonistic, or opposing, muscle groups, such as your back and chest. You can also change to an upper/lower split routine in which you alternate upper-body workouts with lower-body ones. Or try a total-body workout a few times a week.
"My buddy can't make it tonight." It's easy to blame others. "If you're serious about training, think of it like a job," says Murphy. "If your training partner was an employee who continually was late and had poor performance, what would you do? You'd fire him!"
"I hate working out alone." Go to the gym at the same time and on the same days. Say hi to people. You'll find others who are on your schedule, says Abramson.
"I should really stay with my wife tonight and help with the baby. Plus, The O.C. is on." Or you could help all three of you. More and more gyms have child-care centers so you and your wife can get away and spend time together—something that new parents need, says Abramson. Or go over the calendar with your wife: For every day she's out, you can schedule a workout.
"Everyone's going out for drinks." Join them once a week "and you won't appear standoffish," Abramson says. But eat first. By having your drinks with a meal, you won't drink, snack and eat dinner later.
"But The O.C. is on!" "Create a commitment you can't get out of," says Platkin. Make an appointment with a trainer who will charge you whether you show or not.
"I commute for an hour. I'm not getting back in my car." Go straight from work twice a week, then work out at home the other nights.
We heard you were ready for a gut-busting 2006. This would be the year you'd stick to your muscle-building, fat-burning covenant: the New Year's resolution. No missed days. No empty calories. No wimp-outs. No excuses.
No, really.
We still believe in you. Of the 16 percent of guys who resolve to work out more in the new year, however, 49 percent fail to adhere to their resolutions. We've heard all the excuses. (We've used a few ourselves.)
So we made a list of them—the lame and the understandable. Then we called around to psychologists, dietitians, trainers and men who manage to work out no matter how busy their lives are.
First, the legitimate excuses. We found four: You're sore, you're sick, you're exhausted, you're hurt. That's it.
Soreness means your body needs a break: "Recovery is as important as working out," says Carter Hays, C.S.C.S., a Houston-based personal trainer. Overtraining keeps as many men from reaching their goals as undertraining does, says Hays. An illness means you should knock off and let your body fight the bug. If you're so tired you're drowsy, you could hurt yourself. And if you're injured—especially if you're experiencing joint pain—let your body heal.
As for the rest of the excuses, listen up:
"Looks like rain." Men's Health cover model Gregg Avedon lives in Florida. Do the names Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne mean anything to you? Avedon spent much of 2004 lifting storm shutters and storing away patio furniture, then taking cover. He still looks great. Avedon says your home gym—those dumbbells over there, and your chinup bar—makes staying in a viable option. You can also spice up your indoor cardio by jumping rope or running up and down stairs. Or tie both ends of a resistance band to a doorway, place a towel across your chest, face away from the door with the band (cushioned by the towel) across your chest, and run in place.
"I have no time." Combine things you do anyway—work, breathe—with athletics. Set up business meetings during which you walk or jog; play tennis with your date; take a spin class to find dates; or take your family hiking, suggests Charles Stuart Platkin, M.P.H., author of The Automatic Diet.
"I pack my gym bag and then The O.C. comes on." Get TiVo. Then tell yourself you're going to do just half of your regular routine. "It won't seem so insurmountable, and you'll end up doing the whole workout," says Edward Abramson, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in Lafayette, California.
"I need my sleep." Pat Croce manages to stick with his workouts, and this father of two has been busy hosting his syndicated TV show, Pat Croce: Moving In, and opening a pirate museum in Key West, Florida. "Like me, you have to schedule fitness," he says. On the first of each month, Croce reviews his schedule with his secretary and then his wife, and breaks it down into weeks. Every Sunday, he goes over the coming week, making sure there are gyms at hotels where he'll be staying.
"I don't want to spend $50 a month on a gym membership." Don't. Now's the time to negotiate fees, trial months, or group discounts. Think you don't have the cash? Save $900 a year by switching from cafe mocha to metabolism-boosting green tea when you stop at Starbucks every morning.
"My gym sucks." So move. Changing gyms is an opportunity for you to upgrade your workout. See the next tip.
"I'm bored with my workout." "Throw it in reverse," says Gunnar Peterson, C.S.C.S., author of G-Force. If you always do lat pulldowns with an overhand grip, switch to underhand. Do a reverse-grip bench press, reverse-grip curls, reverse-grip triceps pushdowns. Do front squats, rear lunges, and dumbbell lateral raises with your palms up. Count backward, too. "It's like a blastoff," says Peterson: "5, 4, 3, 2, 1, done."
"I never see results." Maybe you're not looking in the right places. Measure your waist, your heart rate and your weight. Write them down. Then measure again after a week or two, says Croce. Celebrate even the smallest sign of progress. Muscles appear as fat melts.
"Four weeks, and no change in waistline, heart rate, or weight!" Whether you see results or not, you're strengthening your joints and connective tissues, which means you're laying down a foundation for future muscle growth, says Peterson. Your diet, stress, sleep patterns and other factors besides your workout may be holding you back—so don't give up.
"I have no energy." Eat. You need the fuel. "An active guy needs up to 1,000 calories more than an inactive guy," says Gay Riley, R.D.
"I'm just making sure my body is getting adequate time to recover." After 72 hours of rest, you're just sliding backward. "But are you actually giving yourself a chance to recover?" asks Peterson. It's not all about time. Mix L-glutamine into your postworkout shake and eat a diet full of omega-3 fatty acids; they can assist with cellular reconstruction and the removal of metabolic wastes to help you recover faster, Peterson says.
"I always get hurt." This happens when you ratchet up your workout. Focus on losing one pound at a time or boosting your weights in five-pound increments, says C.J. Murphy, M.F.S., owner of Total Performance Sports in Everett, Massachusetts. If you're used to doing 20 minutes on the treadmill, don't try a two-hour road run. If you bench-press 50-pound dumbbells, don't go for 90. Instead, make small increases in the difficulty of your workout, focus on form, and work with a spotter so you still have a safety net, Murphy says.
"My elbows/shins/pinkie toes hurt." "Pain is a sure sign something is awry with your exercise choices," says Murphy. This year, don't isolate body parts so much—your muscles should function as a team. If your shoulder hurts for a week after you do lateral raises, stop doing them. Find a variation that doesn't cause pain, he says.
"I don't want to look stupid trying to use those space-age machines." Approach new machines with enthusiasm. "That's a good way to broaden your fitness spectrum," says Peterson. Read the placard, ask a trainer for assistance, and give it a shot. Nobody's looking. "They're so into themselves that they're not even thinking about you," Peterson says.
"I'm bored again." Organize your workout differently for one to two weeks, says Peterson. Let's say you're usually a push-pull guy—you do chinups and leg curls one workout, bench presses and squats another. Try working antagonistic, or opposing, muscle groups, such as your back and chest. You can also change to an upper/lower split routine in which you alternate upper-body workouts with lower-body ones. Or try a total-body workout a few times a week.
"My buddy can't make it tonight." It's easy to blame others. "If you're serious about training, think of it like a job," says Murphy. "If your training partner was an employee who continually was late and had poor performance, what would you do? You'd fire him!"
"I hate working out alone." Go to the gym at the same time and on the same days. Say hi to people. You'll find others who are on your schedule, says Abramson.
"I should really stay with my wife tonight and help with the baby. Plus, The O.C. is on." Or you could help all three of you. More and more gyms have child-care centers so you and your wife can get away and spend time together—something that new parents need, says Abramson. Or go over the calendar with your wife: For every day she's out, you can schedule a workout.
"Everyone's going out for drinks." Join them once a week "and you won't appear standoffish," Abramson says. But eat first. By having your drinks with a meal, you won't drink, snack and eat dinner later.
"But The O.C. is on!" "Create a commitment you can't get out of," says Platkin. Make an appointment with a trainer who will charge you whether you show or not.
"I commute for an hour. I'm not getting back in my car." Go straight from work twice a week, then work out at home the other nights.
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